ArticlesBlog

Trump’s New Border Wall Is Too Hot to Climb

Trump’s New Border Wall Is Too Hot to Climb


-Let’s get to the news. During a visit to the
U.S./Mexico border yesterday, President Trump
claimed the new wall is designed to absorb heat,
making it harder to climb. So it’s absolutely foolproof unless immigrants can find
some sort of technology that would — damn it! [ Laughter ] Well, at the border,
President Trump called the new fencing,
quote, “virtually impenetrable.” But then again,
he said the same thing after pushing on this
for an hour. [ Laughter ] “There’s no way through.” [ Laughter ] Canadian Prime Minister
Justin Trudeau is facing criticism
after a photo from 2001 surfaced in which he is
wearing brownface. I’m not going to show you
the picture because it’s really bad. It’s so bad that Canadians
traveling in Europe are going to start telling
people they’re American. [ Laughter ] “What?” [ Cheers and applause ] [ Canadian accent ]
“Sorry, where’s my accent from? Oh, I’m from, uh, Houston.” [ Laughter ] “This is a Houston accent.” [ Laughter ] According to reports,
a whistle-blower complaint has been filed against
President Trump for his communications
with a foreign leader, which alleges that Trump
made an undisclosed promise during a phone call. Said Trump, “Well, I don’t know
if he even can dance, but sure, why not.” [ Laughter ] [ Applause ] Producers have announced that
Disney will soon add a character that will serve as its first
Jewish princess. The movie she’s starring in
is called “Chosen.” [ Laughter ] [ Applause ] A delivery van overturned
in Georgia on Friday and spilled over 216,000
gaming dice onto the roadway. Said the driver, “Yahtzee?” [ Laughter ] Today was International
Talk Like a Pirate Day. “Arrr,” said President Trump
trying to pronounce Iran. [ Laughter ] And finally, a new coffee shop
has opened in Seattle called Dreamboyz, which claims
to be the only coffee stand in Washington State operated by
shirtless men, but it’s got
nothing on Starbutts. [ Laughter ]

Comments (100)

  1. It's funny how people still think Trump is a racist mean while there's no proof that he is and here you have Justin Trudeau wearing blackface and has been caught 3 times does anybody think he's a racist well the Democrats don't think so….like really?

  2. Hey kJ what I didn’t put a period at the end that was for little peckerheads like you!!!!!!!

  3. Starbutts! Well, under this circumstances, the prizes for coffee would be entirely justified.

  4. Haha you guys wish we would tell people we are American sorry not gonna happen. :p

  5. Lol, Starbutts. Here in Washington, you can look out the window of any Starbuck's and see another Starbuck's.

  6. I can't wait maga 2020 Lords will

  7. …can someone explain the "Chosen" joke to me?

  8. Laugh at President Trump all you like. Please, do. I do. A lot.

  9. I don't get the Jewish Chosen joke. Is it Chosen like Jews during the Holocaust? Or Chosen like Jesus? Lol

  10. "It's so bad that Canadians traveling in Europe are gonna start telling people they're American."

    No. It's not that bad. Not even close.

  11. What is wrong with generic black face?

  12. Even trump had never done blackface.

  13. I'd like to see Seth climb a fence wearing oven mitts. Maybe for charity?

  14. I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED IF THIS MAN DOESN'T NAME THE DAM WALL. TRUMPS CHOSEN.

  15. Said the driver "Roll for initiative" how did you all miss it?

  16. Hooters: Exists

    Women: THAT IS TOO SEXIST!!!

    Dreamboyz: Exists

    Women: YES! Finally!

  17. LOL, Canadian's pretending to be American. That would never happen. By the way, I'm working on my British accent for unrelated reasons.

  18. Here's a challenge. Build a replica fence, and see how many Mexican's could get over that fence in an hour, using readily available materials on the border, and film it. It would be a hoot. You could set it up in an area where there's isn't a "Trump Fence". I'd watch that segment!

  19. wow imagine that …a metal wall in the desert Southwest…. where the temperatures can get over 100 degrees Fahrenheit !!! who would have thought ???? (sarcasm)

  20. Worst Canadian accent evah!

  21. You could fry an egg on Trump’s face.

  22. Topple Trump's wall over and you have the world's biggest skillet. That's the power of positivity.

  23. I think Trudeau apologizing is rather silly. It was an Arabian nights themed party. Come on people, let's get a grip.

  24. ¨Virtually impenetrable¨, says the man who doesn´t know how to close an umbrella.

  25. Challenge accepted ✌🏽🇲🇽😏 lol

  26. The liberal unhinged is tasting their own bitter pills……
    They promote political correctness n killed common sense…..
    It is not ok to joke on certain people of colours but ok when the colour of white is the subject…..
    See….The double standard or no standard…..
    Actually this is a political game by the puppet masters a.k.a the cabals……
    They only use a few trolls to act it out and use the msm to highlight it like a projector into a huge screen..
    And cry loudly – RACIST …..!!!
    ARE THE BLACKS REALLY THAT SENSITIVE ??? REALLY TGAT FRAGILE ???
    CANNOT EVEN JOKE ON IT ???
    OR IT IS JUST YOU(PUPPET MASTERS) …WHO USE THEM TO GO AGAINST THE WHITE….
    THE SOCIETY IS GETTING LESS N LESS FUN….. MORE N MORE DULL
    EVERYONE IS TIPTOEING AROUND THE EGGSHELLS…..

  27. NOBODY in Europe even remotely cares about the Trudeau "scandal"!
    It is a complete non-issue only Americans have a problem with.

  28. The lack of education in the Republican base is sooo depressing.

  29. "This wall is as impossible to climb as those umbrellas are to fold."

  30. Trump's border wall is a lasting symbol of his total failure as president.MEXICO WILL PAY FOR THE WALL BELIEVE ME TRUST ME.a total failure at keeping any campaign promises.trumps a liar and a con.a total failure at everything except at losing and bankruptcy

  31. Dig a hole .best way to beat any wall.trump is dumber than a dead fish.sorry dead fish for comparing you to trump.please forgive me.

  32. JT' s picture was Black face. There are aloy of Africans and Indigenous peoples in Arabia

  33. Trump officially announced that spelling has been outlawed as well as proper posture. He blames bones for making him look ridiculous. That and new light bulbs.

  34. I think they should shoot them problem solved and once the word gets around that people trying to cross illegally remember the word illegally and they are being shot it would be a very big deterrent for others to try yes it would be very effective more so than a wall a 100 year's ago it wouldn't be a problem but today of course we have to deal with people who give people breaking the law complete compassion this was a time were there where no mass shootings at least not innocent people and immigrants who came to the country didn't fly air planes into building's so as you can see all this compassion we give people today has made this country so much better just look around and just see and feel how wonderful it is YEA RIGHT the compassion has made this so dangerous world we all have to live in so now enjoy the complete mentally unstable complete stupidity

  35. I think the immigrants will start building tunnels under the wall.

  36. THAT'S GENIUS MR PRESIDENT! AND THANK YOU FOR KEEPING US SAFE! THE DUMMYCRATS WANT OPEN BORDERS….. NO THANKS! LET'S KEEP AMERICA STRONG! TRUMP 2020!

  37. Big market in Mexico for cheap HELICOPTERS =I,m in=too good to miss =MASTERBATER OF THE DEAL…

  38. Gee, Do you suppose the fence might be electrified?

  39. Minstrel shows were a uniquely American thing

  40. Or wait until a time when the fence is not hot and people cannot see you. Hmmm ,when would be a good time to climb the fence? What is the opposite of daytime Mr. Trump.

  41. Canadians are americans !!! American continent you fool

  42. The president claimed, the government enlisted professional “world-class mountain climbers” to test different wall designs and evaluate which would be the toughest to scale. “We have, I guess you could say, world-class mountain climbers. We got climbers,” Trump said. “We had 20 mountain climbers. That’s all they do—they love to climb mountains… They’re very good, and some of them were champions. And we gave them different prototypes of walls, and this was the one that was hardest to climb.”

    But actual professional climbers tell a different story. Not only do they doubt that any professionals, let alone twenty of the top mountain climbers in the game, would aid the Trump administration in a task like this, they also say the wall would not be difficult to scale.

    The Daily Beast’s Scott Bixby spoke with numerous members of the climbing community, and they all denied involvement or even knowing of anyone who was or would be involved in helping the government keep immigrants from crossing the border.

    “I have never heard of any climbers ever being recruited to try and climb a border wall,” said Jesse Grupper, who won gold at the 2019 USA Climbing Sport & Speed Open National Championships.

    Another climber and second-ranked U.S. women’s boulderer, Kyra Condie, said, “I absolutely have not heard of anyone testing sections of border wall. It would even be hard to find any of us willing to do anything to help Trump and his efforts in any way.”

    The testing must be all Super Top Secret !! (Donald J Trump is a f'ing moron.)

  43. Who climbs a wall when you can go under.

  44. That's what happen when you hired a bad comedian as a president. 😑

  45. 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸TRUMP 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸TRUMP 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸TRUMP 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸TRUMP 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸TRUMP 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸TRUMP 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸TRUMP 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸TRUMP 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

  46. Will the wall be tested by builders? Quality control… very important.🤔

  47. You morons say no wall has been and never will be built, remember! what wall are you talking about?

  48. Trump: This wall is realy hot. If it wasn't my wall I would proably date it.

  49. It is not a "New" Border Wall It is a short section that was to be repaired and he augmented,. He is a failure!

  50. It's a fence. Call it a fence.

  51. That would be called Mormonism 🤨😇😍

  52. Trumpty Dumpty sat on a WALL, Trumpty Dumpty had a great fall…!

  53. Now that's comedy gold!! Trump joke, Trump joke, Lewandowski joke, Trump joke, Trump joke, Trump joke, Bernie joke (actually I'm not sure… it could have been true), bull semen joke. Do you have to be brain dead to watch this show…or is that the result of watching it?

  54. So that truck driver rolled a natural 1?

  55. Haha, Meyers isn't funny. Please leave the politics aside and focus on your craft, because right now, you got nothing

  56. The USA'S new border wall

  57. Should light those ladders and ropes on fire.

  58. That is a smart wall!

  59. I thought Mexico was going to pay for the wall. Obviously, Trump broke a campaign promise. Trump’s follower’s don’t care. They wouldn’t care if he tore up the Constitution. Oh, wait…

  60. I say we cook breakfast on it. The very stable genius believes eggs will stick to and cook on it vertically.

  61. If Orange Sphincter can't get over or through the wall then it's impenetrable

  62. When are you going to be funny?

  63. one tank vs border wall

  64. That guy he called a General is not a General. Border Patrol doesn't have a General rank.

  65. this guys an idiot. lol. im sure climbing a wall will be feasable when your wearing mittins. thats why rock climbers us them right?

  66. It works! It keeps people out! It works! It keeps people out! It works! It keeps people out!
    how many times to we have to tell idiots this!?

  67. 2 girls were filmed scaling the border wall only hands and feet in 15 seconds.

  68. Aladdin isn't black

  69. Immigrants could just climb it at night… My god, Trump is such a moron.

  70. Why not just put guys with guns along border and shoot every illegal that crosses. Pay them $1,000 for every adult they kill. Kids can be deported for now.

  71. IN MY ENTIRE LIFE … I've never felt the need to color my skin differently for any reason.

    but I guess if you want to be in politics …

  72. Do fences around your own house work?

  73. what an unfunny piece of garbage. never watch!

  74. I DARE liberals to climb that wall in oven mitts. I DARE YOU!

  75. Rational overwhelmed by hates and bigotry

  76. LOL ya Americans wish Canadians were more hated in the world but nope 😉 it's not that we're better than Americans…it's just that Americans are so loud about everything they just make us quiet ones look good lol

  77. ( F A C T !!!!!!!!!!!)
    USA 🇺🇸 CITIZENS NEED TO STOP BUYING DRUGS / STOP PAYING FOR SEX ( like trump )/
    and 'STOP' shooting our people
    1.. Bad guys would be out of business!!
    2. Problem is rite here in front of us!!
    stop blaming others

  78. I just dug under the fence. I m in.

  79. Thought Mexico was going to pay for the wall?……Another flat out lie!!

  80. Well no crap they're in a desert of course its going to be hot and they even painted them a color that doesn't produce as much heat as black would of and by the way your show is a joke!!!! If you don't like the way the country's being ran the right way then get out 🖕

  81. Well Canadians are American just like Mexico is America.. Hmm North America has 3 Countries Mexico , U.S and Canada. Lets not forget South America and Central America. Anyone born in South America, Central America and North America are American… Big difference if its U.S Citizen vs American Citizen. We don't have a American Military we have a U.S Military we don't have a American president we have a U.S president, we don't have a American Olympic team we have a U.S Olympic team… We have a U.S Orange little hand President.

  82. Somebody end this morons ability to talk.

  83. The world’s greatest military is having their budget cut to build a wall…

  84. I think there is a reason why this is a late night show…..I almost fell alseep watching this. So boring and not at all funny. The best joke was the last one and it wasn't even really funny…..weak.

  85. Did anyone see the news where the 8 year old girl climbed the wall lol

  86. It will be very hot in the summer months. But more important what else has been added to that wall of steel? Wood and concrete can't vibrate and are not conductive.

  87. Anti American Jews are everywhere!
    Do you think they like you?

  88. Fun competition in KY of people climbing a replica in less than 30 seconds. Took an 8 year old girl a whole minute.

  89. The taco eating terrorists will just use gloves

  90. A Wrought Iron Gate Is Not a Wall

  91. The homosexual mentally insane Democrats are all TRAITORS

  92. Another wasted $25 billion by the Repug-Bull-KLANs…

    The Trump wall can be easily penetrated by a $100 reciprocating saw available at any hardware store

    The wall is beginning to sound a lot like Trump. Thin-skinned and easy to break

    "It's impenetrable. You can't go under it, you can't go over it. Well, you can cut right through it, but it's easily replaced! So, other than cutting through it, it's impenetrable! And we meant to make it that way!" –

    Who said that… CommieGroperFuhrer Trump

    https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2019/11/4/1897140/-Smugglers-have-sliced-through-Trump-s-virtually-impenetrable-border-fencing-with-100-saws?detail=emaildkre

    https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=trump+wall

  93. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEvq1ARXIgA

Comment here