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Clinton Foundation: Celebrity Division

Clinton Foundation: Celebrity Division


Alright, come, guys, it’s been two hours, we don’t have anything. President Clinton called on us to use our celebrity creativity to brainstorm new initiatives, to help his foundation do even more good, in the next 10 years. He’s going to be calling any second now. Yes! First of all, thanks for calling on me. It’s been a while. I have three words: Global Breathing Initiative. Global Breathing Initiative. Keep talking. Okay, well, we all know that the foundation has retrofitted buildings all over the world to reduce carbon emissions. But, what about the people inside the building? So you’re saying? So, you’re saying…what are you saying? Every time we exhale, we release carbons into the atmosphere, right? So, what if everyone in the world holds their breath for one minute every day. I know they say that there are no bad ideas in brainstorming, but that’s a horrible idea. Is it? Please don’t say anything like that again. Is it horrible? Or is it the best? What do you got Danson? You’ve been pretty quiet. Well alright, off the top of my head, what if we were to start an entrepreneur mentoring program that would provide 72,500 hours of pro-bono consulting to urban entrepreneurs? That is a beautiful idea. God, I love you. That would be a great idea if we hadn’t already done it and you hadn’t just read it in the brochure. No, no I didn’t read it. I was not reading. I have an idea. Ah! Finally, somebody comes prepared. Just pass them down. It’s a very simple initiative. Whereby, people do not steal my lunch from the break room fridge. That’s specifically why I put my name on the bag. Okay. Simple initiative. Who’s taking Sean’s sandwiches? The fact that he has to make up a flyer, saying stop stealing my sandwiches… Can we talk about a serious problem here? Yes! Matt, please. Go ahead. Our team spirit, which is why I’ve been saying we need to start the office softball team. I mean I can play third base, I can play first base, I can play center field, I can play short field Danson can pitch, right? Oh yes, hey, I can still throw some real fire. He really can. Ted throws fire all the time. You know what? That’s really private. I got it. Four words. Two words: shut up. You got it! Ben, I got something. Hey, Jack Black! What’s up, guys? Thanks for turning on your computer and sitting in front of it. Every good foundation needs a theme song, right? Well, how about this? [Jack Black singing] Jack! Jack! That’s great! You froze! Really? It seems totally clear on my end. Come on, guys. We really got to pick it up here. Are we just dropping the softball idea? Yes, we are. We are dropping that idea. Oh, I got it! I got it! Eleven words: International Bake Sale Changing the World One Cookie At a Time. Cookies? You like cookies? I like cookies, too. That’s why I pack them in my lunch. My cookies. My water. See? Same thing on my lunch bag. Same thing, simple initiative. Hello! Actionable, clear, let’s do it. Can you all hear me in that room over there? Hello, sir! President Clinton, hi, sir. We didn’t realize you were on the line. Well, I’m a bit busy, but I just wanted to check-in with you all because I know you’re doing such a good job. I can’t wait to hear all the ideas you’ve got. Well, we have a number of very promising ideas that I can go through with you right now. There’s a…we’re throwing around this global ban on breathing idea. And the other was a Clinton Foundation softball team. The Clinton Clobberers, sir. And may I just say that the mascot would be a cheetah. Fastest animal on land. That’s Matt Damon. And last but not least, we were thinking that every foundation should have a theme song. [Jack Black singing] I’m going to be honest with you, in all my years of public service, I have never, and I mean never, heard so many amazing ideas in one sentence. Thank you, sir. Thank you. That’s what we think, too. Now I do not want any of you to leave that office until you have all those great initiatives fully mapped out and worked out. Do you understand me? There’s a lock on the door. We’re not going anywhere. We’re on it. We are on it, sir. Well, listen. I gotta run to give this speech. But I’ll check back with you in a couple of hours, see how you’re all doing. I’m so proud of you guys. You’re my little celebrity army. Thank you! Oh. Mr. President, God bless you. Kevin, what did I tell you about making crank calls in my office? Not to do it. Not to do it without me. You hungry? [Jack Black singing] You’re not…I’ve got a whole lot…It gets
better.

Comments (24)

  1. how does this not have more views!!

  2. ARKANSAS CELEBS LOVE CLINTON!! speaking of Mary and Ted… we were starring in their scene on Curb Your Enthusiasm episode #55 on HBO Miss Arkansas USA 1997 Tamara Henry has photo with Ted in 1997 when he had black hair and 2007 when he had white hair

  3. Very funny, well scripted and acted with a message. Well done!

  4. woww…..If i were apart of…

    kind regard from West Papua, Clinton Health Access Initiative

  5. Sweetest man in the universe! God himself paid us a visit!

  6. Was watching Clinton getting his Medal of Freedom this morning, and I swear I heard Sean Penn screaming "STOP STEALING MY DAMN LUNCH!" LOL LOL LOL!

  7. Perfect spot on impression of Bill Clinton, Kevin Spacey!  That was absolutely amazing!!!!

  8. Norberg !! Can you say blov jobs??? WO men's right?? Can yo accept money from  Sud Arobia and other count ries who are not so much found on wo men's right. Give me a blojob. You all ar sholes.

  9. Total revenue of the American Red Cross is $3,412,238,741.  Clinton foundation in excess of $2,000,000,000.  Has any of you contributed to this foundation?

  10. This should be entitled "The Clinton Foundation of Bullshitology".

  11. Can I get a Clinton Foundation cap?

  12. None of those people (bar Ben Stiller, Danson and Steenburgen) are in the same room at the same time.

  13. pedophile island….

  14. The greatest sycophants of our time, all in the same room, promoting the most fraudulent organization of all time.

  15. Super funny and I like all of these actors so I hope they are not corrupt like the Clinton's!!!

  16. Based on your previous video with Kevin Spacey I'm just going to assume everyone in this video is also a pedophile. You people deserve to hang for what you do to children.

  17. So where are the pedophiles in this clip? #whereisghislaine all these silly actors from Pedowood…so wait a minute did Epstein help found The Clinton Initiative or the Clinton Foundation? 26 trips on Lolita Express to Little St James Bill…Lest We Forget

  18. Albright, Iraq, Haiti, Yugoslavia… Epstein!!!!

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